It's the end of the world as I know it!

Right! It's a disaster. Now this is normally me:

I love shopping! It's brilliant! I love it even more when I've got nothing planned for the day but to shop shop shop with my mates (good shopping mates: Suz and Rach - see below)

We just chill out and have a good old laugh. We shop, drink coffee, shop, eat lunch, shop, refreshment and shop. Then we go home and play wih our purchases! O the joy!

However, I've come more and more to the realisation over the past couple of days that this is more like me:

Yesterday I went for a look around the shops but wasn't in the mood and couldn't be bothered - what is that all about? I COULDN'T BE BOTHERED!!! I can always always be bothered shopping! and today, I went to the beautiful Tescos - my local and just was uninspired and only ended up buying caramel shortcakes as a consolation for the ways I was feeling!

So you see, it's a disaster! I don't know who to be anymore! Who am I? I do hope that this is just a blip in my life and that I can find my identity again.

Tonight I was going to look after my beautiful godson Hayden because his parents Caroline (my cousin) and Russell were due to go to the final practices for the big carol service on Sunday. Hayden is the most beautiful boy in the world - his father will not thank me for calling him beautiful - that's how you describe girls he would say. Anyway, poor Hayden had a collision with the ground today and had to go to hospital where he was stitched up just above his eye. So because of this, Caroline decided that she would stay in to make sure he was ok. I'm kind of glad about that because I wouldn't have wanted him puking on me if he was suffering from concusion. Last time I looked after him, his thank you present to me was a nasty sickness bug where I thought I had died and gone to hell! Anyway, I going to see them tomorrow to check up on them and I'm really quite excited about it.

Also today, my friend Liz text me to get my prayer mat out because her twin sister Nic who expecting a baby, waters broke in the night and the baby isn't due for another couple of weeks. Now a couple of weird things happened today because of this. Firstly I sent an email out to a few friends to tell them to get praying and all of a sudden as I'm having a chat to Manda on the phone about it, I get an email from no other than Nic herself - I asked her what on earth she was doing as I thought she was having a baby! It gave me a fright! She seemed as calm as anything waiting for the midwife. And secondly, I sent a text to liz to see if there was any news later on today. Liz told me that there wasn't but that her lower back had been killing her all day. I thought (because her and Nic are twins) that she was going to have a phantom baby and have all these sympathy symptons and was quite excited about that. When I mentioned it to Liz she told me it was because she thought she had a cold coming on - doh! How can she be thinking about that when her twin sister's about to give birth!

isn't life just a bit weird and crazy sometiimes - you just never know what's around the corner. A couple of people have used this cliche to me this past week. I'm watching out more carefully for those corners at the moment because some of them you just don't want to be going round - but keep right on that straight road! I've gone down some corners in the past couple of days I'm not happy with. I'm having a few days rest now.

Bed for me now. I think today has been the longest day in the history of the world!

laters!
cx

Saliva City!

So last night was kidz club which I help out at. We have two clubs at my church on Monday evening. The first one is for 6-10 yr olds and the 2nd one is for up to 13 year olds. The 2nd club is just a hang out club - we put snooker, table tennis and other games out for them to just chill out at. About 20 kids come along and it's good fun - we've made some good relationships with them all. The 1st club is cracking! I love it. It's more structured and so each week we try and organise something for them. We have seven boys who come along and they are so funny. Last night we had a challenges night. We gave the boys different challenges like how many sit-ups they can do in a minute and how long can they go without blinking and so the list goes on. The best challenge was to see how long they could keep a malteser in between their teeth. After a while, the saliva builds up and then we get them to bend over and all the saliva dribbles out on to the floor- it's so funny and the boys loved it! What a laugh! It's great working with that age. They are so brilliant.

Today at work has been crazy. Yesterday Ian (who I work with) and I decided that we would try not to laugh at all today. However, by the time I got to work I'd already laughed very heartily about 3 times so I was on to a loser from the beginning. When Ian came in, he took ages to walk up the stairs and when he walked in the door he had this face on him which was trying so hard to not to laugh. He explained that he had walk up the stairs slowly so to get into the right frame of mind not to laugh - which made me laugh. It was hopeless, within ten minutes, both Ian and I had laughed millions of times! However, I love laughing! When I die, I want to die laughing! Wouldn't that be a fabulous way to die? I was thinking of the song Uncle Albert sings in the film Mary Poppins when they float to the ceiling because they are laughing so much:


I love to laugh
Loud and long and clear
I love to laugh
It's getting worse ev'ry year

The more I laugh
The more I fill with glee
And the more the glee
The more I'm a merrier me
It's embarrassing!
The more I'm a merrier me!

Some people laugh through their noses
Sounding something like this "Mmm..."
Some people laugh through their teeth goodness sake
Hissing and fizzing like snakes

Some laugh too fast
Some only blast - ha!
Others, they twitter like birds
Then there's the kind
What can't make up their mind

When things strike me as funny
I can't hide it inside
And squeak - as the squeakelers do
I've got to let go with a ho-ho-ho...
And a ha-ha-ha...too!

We love to laugh
Loud and long and clear
We love to laugh
So ev'rybody can hear
The more you laugh
The more you fill with glee
And the more the glee
The more we're a merrier we!


The rest of the day was just crazy like that - laughing all the time. People were just in a very crazy mood today - especially this afternoon. It was ridiculous. Looking back over the day and what we were doing, I find myself thanking God that I can laugh! I know that there's probably many people in this world right now who can't bring themselves to laugh for many reasons. I thank God that despite all the things that have happened in my life, I'm still able to laugh now. They say that laughing is very good for you and is like a jog on the inside. I reckon in that way I'm in good shape! I thank God that he has surrounded me with many people who also love to laugh! I love laughing!

However, with that in mind, I am now feeling a sense of mourning as tonight was the last in the series of Trinny and Susannah Undressed. I absolutely love Trinny and Susannah! I think they are very beautiful, strong and wise ladies. And I do believe that the way you dress says a lot about you but also makes a whole difference to the way you feel about yourself - rightly or wrongly. Their new series has been really emotional to watch. I love the way that they make people feel better about themselves the way they are now. They don't try to change their actual bodies but try to make the best of them. Bless them! I hope someone buys me the new Trinny and Susannah book for Christmas. I'm not buying it now in the hope that someone will! We laughed at the possibility of Trinny and Susannah coming into our office and making over all of us working there. I reckon that would be a real challenge but very very funny!

Right, can't write an epic again so I'm finishing up now. Remember, laugh - see how much better it makes you feel! Come on, you can do it!

laters
cx

Panda Sneezes

This so cute and funny. Every time I watch it it makes me laugh. As always, children can make a massive impact on our lives!

WHO AM I???

DISC profiling yeah? This is what we did in work yesterday. It was basically training to see what sort of person you are in your team. There are 4 main categories - Dominance, Influence, steadiness and conscientious. To start there were about 28 questions. Each question had short character descriptions and you had to mark which out of the four you were most like in a team and which one you were least like. From that we got points which we plotted on this grid and that somehow worked out what sort of person we were. My highest two (by far) were i and s which were Influence and steadiness. Which figures - especially the influence. In a group it means that I tend to be motivated by relationships rather than task. I am quite an encouraging person but also require that for myself. I don't like to be kept out of any social activity going on (which would be hard in my office because I'm the one who generally organises them!). Anyway, it was interesting because there was only one Dominance in our office which worked out well because it was our boss! Most people were a mixture of conscientious and steadiness. There were only two influence and I was one of them. I read the description of my two characteristics and it was freakily like me! Which challenged me because we all like to be individuals. God made each one of us unique and special - there is no one else like us - well that's what we preach but yet I fitted into this box perfectly along with many other people who have done this training and worked out to be this type of person as well! I wasn't happy about this to be quite honest! So perhaps my aim in life now on is to fit into none of these characteristics but to make up a brand new one which IS unique to me! However, perhaps there is some comfort in knowing at the times when you feel a complete weirdo freak that other people feel and act the same way as you. Also, one of the supposed character weaknesses of being in the influence category was that you tend to be excitable. Now, when in the world did it become a weakness to be excitable? Are we all meant to walk around like blooming Zombies now? What's that all about?!?!?! I understand that there are negative points to being excitable - but you can say that about many characteristics can't you? I know that being excitable can mean that you might be slightly annoying to others at times and that perhaps you may make rash decisions but on the whole I would say that excitement brings about enthusiasm, motivation, happiness and is a generally positive emotion. It also means that you never really get bored of life! Look I know that this shouldn't be taken too seriously - and I'm not doing that but these are just some points about this that I wanted to get off my chest. Is being excitable a weakness? Discuss!

I am gutted to say that I a never got to see The Polar Express last night after my rantings about it in my last post. I had every intentions of seeing it but then got caught up with chatting to my boss. Now if anyone knows my boss, you will be aware that once you get him started talking - there's just no stopping him! He is a good guy, a really good boss, a really sincere christian example to me and we have a good laugh. He was once the private secretary to the general of The Salvation Army. I know that he gets quite a bit of stick within TSA about this job being a cushy number. The nickname for people in this job is "the general's bag carrier" but I find his stories about it really interesting and i could listen to him going on for hours. He recognises that this job did allow him loads of amazing opportunities but with those amazing opportunities also came some real challenges; having to cope with the almost constant travelling like being in Pakistan for 5 days and then getting home only to fly off somewhere else 36 hours later for a few days - yes I know all you travellers would think this was great but to be doing this for 3 or 4 years (or however many years it was) constantly i don't reckon is great and not good for your whole body clock. It's not like it's a holiday when they get to these destinations is it? They didn't stay in the best hotels all the time. They had to stay in some awful places where the food was dodgey, the sheets were not clean, the toilet was a pot and not eating properly for days on end and anything you did eat there was always the fear it was going to have a negative effect on you - so you'd have to make sure you took enough of the necessary medication for such times and have to carry on regardless - put a smile on your face even though inside your stomach you felt like Big Daddy and Giant Haystacks were having a wrestling match and having to deal with people who had dillusions of grandeur as to how important they were. All of this is not in the least bit my idea of a cushy number! However, they did get to visit some amazing place, staying in some amazing hotels, meet some amazing people and experience some amazing things and he never complains about it - the positive experiences far outweigh the negative and the negative ones were all character building and perhaps many of them you wouldn't want to change. So he says that when (and a big IF!) I become an officer, if I'm ever offered this job I should jump at it. Unfortunately we realized after saying this that really only people who fit into the Conscientious category (like he does) would be suitable for this job because you had to be very organised and quite task and end result orientated. I don't think that this job is suited to someone like me who is an 'i". I don't think they'd want someone too excitable!


I think quite alot about the pros and cons of The Salvation Army being such a big part of my life and the discussions with my boss last night about his job with the General brought about a bit more thinking. I was brought up as an officers child. My parents were (and still are) Salvation Army officers. Now the demands of this job meant that they were pretty much on call all the time, so were out pretty much every evening, we had to spend most christmas days at the army, no particular place felt like home because we had to move around a fair old bit, so you were changing schools and having to make new friends which was a right pain and often you as the offspring didn't leave home to go to university like most in the family rites of passage but the parents left you to go to another appointment. I reckon that there's a number of OK's (affectionate name for officer's kids) who have a massive chip on their shoulder about this and I guess I can understand why because we didn't get a lot choice or say in this lifestyle - it was chosen for us (in many cases before we were even born) and I guess there have been a number of occasions as I've grown up when I have could nurtured the negative feelings about it. But then I actually look back on my life so far and just thank God for the amazing opportunities being an OK has given me. I have lived in some brilliant places. I have met some brilliant people and made some great friends. Because of a special bursary offered to ministers children, I was able to go to a private school which was one of the best schools in Edinburgh and this gave me such a good education. I have had my eyes opened to some real interesting, sad, scarey, funny, amazing experiences all which have helped mould me into the person I am today. Plus I have had THE MOST perfect example of parents anyone could hope for. They have been two of the most brightest stars shining in my life and have been brilliant examples of what being a true christian is about. If i do end up being an officer as well - which is what I'm planning on doing, if I'm half the officer my parents have been, then I'll be doing well. In all walks of life there pros and cons and it's easy to walk around with a chip on your shoulder about the cons. But as christians, God never promised us that life would be easy. He didn't promise that we would never have hard times. He promised that he would be with us always and give us all we needed to get through. He came to give us life in all it's fulness. He told us to celebrate Him (and in Him we celebrate life) all day every day. We're told that the joy of the Lord is our strength. All of this reminds me that life is so much better when we concentrate on the pros rather than the cons. That we acknowledge the cons as character building and learning experiences but that they don't dominate our lives and our relationships. It's something I'm still learning at times but I'm trying hard to live by. A quote I read recently: 'I can complain because the rose bush has thorns or rejoice because the thorn bush has a rose - it's up to me"

laters!
cx

Hands Up for Coffee!

I love going for coffee with Marilyn! She's one of the nicest but craziest ladies I know next to my mum and Heidie! Every month or two we meet for coffee - just as friends but also as a support to each other. Our coffee sessions last for most of the day. We met at Starbucks at 10:30am today and we finished about 2:30pm! It's crazy! We reckoned that if Starbucks had one of those loyalty cards where you got a stamp for every coffee you ordered and then had a free one every ten coffees then we would be claiming our free coffee in one sitting! Anyway, Mazza - (as I affectionately call her - and Bazza her husband!) is great and I love her dearly. She's one of those people who you sit down and look at and just want to tell everything to her coz just by listening and smiling she makes things right and she's just so caring and encouraging. She really is a bright star shining in my life. God bless her!



Tonight I went to Dorchester to catch up with my mum at my auntie Anne's flat. We showed Auntie Anne and her friend Sandra the photo's from our trip to Zambia - just let me check, is there anyone who has not seen these photos yet because I'm sure between my parents and i we have shown the world and his wife! and just in case someone hasn't I've put in a cheeky couple of pics of our safari - the beautiful hippos and cheeky dung beetle. My Auntie Anne is something else. Once you meet her there's no forgetting her! If you ever watch Last of the Summer Wine there's a character on it called Marina who is Howard's fancy piece. There are likenesses between her and my Auntie Anne but Auntie Anne is about 20 times worse. when she talks she could go in competition with a fog horn and I have never met anyone else like her in my life. She and mum are like opposite ends of the spectrum the only common bond is their craziness. Nevertheless, I absolutely love her and wouldn't swap her for any auntie in the world. We're all going to Copenhagen for a few days next month and she is determined to get herself a danish man like Peter Schmichael (I take it he's danish - I'm not sure - that's what she says). I'm not sure if she'll find him in the christmas markets but I'm all for looking!


So the Toad in the Hole .... Oh my word! It was absolutely lovely and if you could only taste it over the website I'd let you have a slice from the picture which shows Suz showing off her prize-winning creation. Well done Suz with some very nice roasties and peas and sweetcorn - you just can't beat it. I bought a nice cherry pie and custard for pudding. I rolled home that night I tell you and I'm still rolling!


So tomorrow we're having a training day in my office. Its the DISC training - not sure what that stands for but apparently it's about finding out what role you take on in a team. It should be quite interesting. I like doing things like this - finding out what sort of person I am. I shall update you as to what I find out about myself. In the evening I'm going back to Petersfield to check out their kids club. They're showing the Polar Express which I'm very very excited about. It's a beautiful film and the animation/graphics are amazing. I went to see it in the cinema originally with Suz and Rach. There were many gasps of amazment from us during the film because of the graphics - it was so lifelike. The best bit is when the elves are just about to meet Santa Claus and they start with a "oooohhhh" which starts quietly and gradually gets louder and they move their arms from one side to the other above their heads and then break out into "You better watch out, You better not cry, you better not pout I'm telling you why, Santa Claus is coming to town" and then there is an enormous cheer and Santa appears! Woohoo!!!! It's sooo beautiful. If you've not seen it - DO! and do it this christmas! do it now before it's too late!

laters!
cx

Another Culinary Delight ....

My friend Suz she is a blooming fab cook. Tonight's culinary delight is Toad in the Hole. She's never made it before but I reckon it will be just beautiful. She has got the gift of hosting and I think I'm very good at being hosted! Anyway, Suz and I used to share a house with my bro Richard (whom I love very very much and miss loads - he lives in Zambia you know). The deal was that Suz and occasionally Rich would do the cooking and I would do the washing up coz I hate cooking so much! Anyway, she's moved down to Southampton now which is very good for me because I was getting quite sick fed-up of my cooking so have been making the most of it! and what's even better now is that Suz has got a dishwasher! Sooooo I don't need to keep to my side of the arrangement! Cheeky!! Suz has just said that she loves cooking! Out of the blue - no one asked her to say it and quite frankly she can keep it! I hate cooking! I'm not the worst cook - I can cook. I'm more in the Won't cook if I can help it group. If I ever find the man of my dreams (a very big IF because my experience of men recently is making me crazy! Is there ever a dream man? A debate for another day) Anyway, if I ever find the man of my dreams amongst many other attributes (standards standards!) he really must have the gift of cooking and enjoying it. I will do the washing, I will clean the toilet (I strangely find that rewarding), I will dust, I will hoover, (I would say I would iron but I'm not overly sure what that is!) but I will not cook if I can absolutely help it! I just don't like it! Have I made my point? I tried watching Saturday Kitchen to inspire me but it just made me salivate and just go and make myself another slice of toast. However, having said that, I do enjoy Tesco's Finest Chilli and Pork Sausages with wedges and roasted vegetables. mmmmnnnn! Sausages are just delicious.

Today has been a bit of a nuisance day. Ian (who I work with) and I were going to deliver a lecture on communicating with Children and Youth at The Salvation Army Officer training college in London tomorrow. We were flapping this morning getting our stuff organised and then Ian had a phone call from Lou - his wife to say that she had taken the third child in his collection (a long story - and a long family!) to the doctor because he has a chest infection and the anti-biotics weren't working so the doctor told her to take him to the hospital for a chest x-ray. On having the x-ray done, they found that poor baby Benny has got Pneumonia in both his lungs! God bless him! So they're keeping him in hospital for a few days. The wee soul! Anyway, that put a halt to our visit to London tomorrow so our flapping was wasted!

So only 2 weeks today until my brother Richard (or big dick as I sometimes affectionately call him!) and Heidie will coming home for Christmas from Zambia. They work for The Salvation Army out there at Chikankata hospital (check out his blog: www.charliechikankata.blogspot.com). They've been there since May last year. We went over to see them in April this year and had an absolutely fabulous time. We're going again next April. Anyway, I miss them so much. I know before they went they lived in Scotland so I wasn't seeing them very much then either but it was a lot easier to see them should the opportunity arise! Sometimes, I wish I had another brother or sister (delivered by the stork of course!) as it's a bit lonely with rich being so far away. I hope that God doesn't tell them to stay there! Rich is one of the funniest, most generous and most wisest person I know. And Heidie is one of the most beautiful but craziest person I know and when they are together they make me laugh.

Right - the toad in the hole is ready. I can't tell you how excited I am about eating it! It's taken some time to make but I know it will be worth it! will tell you about it.
laters!

Woo hoo! I'm a blogger!

This is very exciting! I've finally decided to get blogged up! I don't know how it will all work out and whether I'll be motivated to keep it going for long but hey - I'm gonna give it a try. I wonder if I can make my life seem interesting? It's interesting to me but I just wonder if it will be to people who read this?

Today, I have led the worship in Peterfield. It's been a fun day. I like the people at Petersfield - they're really lovely people who are very welcoming and make me laugh. The kids there are so keen and happy to be there and that's so encouraging. In today's society there's so many other things for kids to do on a sunday that church often loses out. These kids from Petersfield are made to feel loved and cared for and the adults really take a keen interest in them and each other. You know, you can have all the up-to-date technology etc.. but at the end of the day I reckon what most people want is to be made to feel loved and cared for because life can be so busy and inpersonal and that's more of a pull than any state of the art stuff.

However, I will say that Petersfield has been a very cold place for me today - my feet have been like blooming blocks of ice and I have been glad to come home just to thaw them out. I'm looking forward to getting into my bed because I've got the electric blanket on ready to warm up my tootsies!

Have had a nice time unwinding since I've got in - checking out my emails and watching CSI - I love the new channel Five US coz it shows CSI all the time - it's cracking! I don't know what it might say about me that I really like programmes like this. I've really missed Midsommer Murders tonight. Mum and I normally have a wee bet to see how many murders there's been. It's brilliant Sunday evening viewing. Mum and dad often have to visit Midsumer Norton as it's in their area for work. I always get slighty worried when they go there - I don't want them to be any of the murders I'm betting on! I make sure I tell them to be careful when they're going near the place - you just never know!

Well my feet cannot take it any longer. I'm off to warm them up. So my first blog is finished. I've quite enjoyed doing it really. I didn't think I had that much to say!

laters cx